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alisa's help community
17th-Jan-2008 06:59 pm(no subject)
 Hey, i am 19 years old living in new york city. My problem is about a guy, and it's a serious issue for me thats been affecting me greatly and it's not rediculous and childish as it sounds. I recently started a new job at a restaurant that pretty much like, but all the other girls that i'm hostessing with are models, who the managers flirt with constantly. I don't think i'm an ugly girl, but I can't compare with the models. Anyway there was a waiter there who was an older man (only 29, not really am older man, but older than me, which i need a man who is older than me because I am quite mature for my age and do not have much luck with the immature assholes my age. Anyway he really liked me, constantly asking me when we were going to hang out and asking me for my number, and always praising me for how beautiful I was. I was being superficial and convincing myself that I didn't like him because he wasnt that attractive. He had a nice body and was the sweetest guy ever (he was from greece), but in the beginning I didn't like him too much. As time went on I noticed myself convincing myself to change my schedule to be on the same shifts as him, just because I liked the flattery, but before I knew it, I was really beginning to like him. I was speaking with one of my waitress friends and he came up one day and she was telling me how he was so heartbroken after his fiancee left him. She was talking about how much of a good and sweet guy he was and how he really truly cared about her and loved her immensly, and she was rough and had him "on lock", never let him go out with his friends and she never thanked him in any of her plays (she was a broadway actress), only thanked her friends and insignificant people. After hearing this I knew how much of a good guy he was, and it made me like him so much, even more. He told me that I looked like Betty Boop always and was so so sweet to me. My like for him had grown to the point that I couldn't wait to see him. He kept asking me to go hang out with him and i played the coy act. I know now that if you like someone, you should just give them your number or go hang out with them, but I always thought I had tomorrow to get with him. Unfortunately tomorrow never came. One day that we were scheduled to work with him I checked the schedule to see why he wasn't in and saw his name crossed out for all 3 days in the week, and no hours under his name for the next weeks schedule. No one knew why his name was scratched out, but I knew something was wrong. The feeling in my gut was horrible. A few days later, I found out that there was a big shake up in the restaurant because of "service changes" and since he was the newest waiter, he was fired. I am now crushed because I never got to tell him how I felt, and he probably left thinking that I never cared about him. I have pretty much no way to reach him, I can steal his number from the employee contact sheet but I think i'm too afraid to take the inititive, in fear that he'll freak out, or just in fear in general. I never call the guy, i'm used to him calling me, but there is no chance he can call me because he doesn't have my number. I think it would be easier to tell one of the waitresses that still speaks to him that I said hello or for him to give me a call, but shes very judgemental and has a very big mouth so I think she'll say "EWWW HES UGLY" and tell everyone that I liked him (she'll probably still tell him though, but if she doesn't speak to him anymore I ruined my reputation of professionalism and wasted my chance with him. I'm afraid to tell her either. I'm so afraid to reach out to him, and I think he probably hasn't thought of me at all since leaving, or maybe he's been thinking about me like i'm thinking about him. I've been crying for a week and I'm absolutely miserable about this. PLEASE SOMEONE HELP!!!
21st-Jul-2007 03:22 pm - guilt
Hello I'm Wanda, I'm 23 and currently I'm prematurely married to a very confusing bipolar man whom I love dearly.  I also have mental illness.. and I am always having very mixed feelings about my husband.  

I have a lot going on with me right now, so please try to bear with me if this turns out to be a little long.  Anyway, lately I'm beginning to truely discover how badly my impulsiveness is affecting my love life..  Things between my husband and I have always been rocky and and confusing.  Right now we are on the brinks of getting an anullment because we both feel that our relationship is too unstable.  

There are alot of different areas of my relationship that I could branch off into.. but I'm mostly focused on what is going on right now so I'll just talk about that.  hmm.. where should I begin?  Well.. let's see.. basically I'm feeling really guilty about my lack of emotion towards our most resent break up.  We have been separtated for a few months for reasons that would take too long to write about right now.. But a few weeks ago I was able to hear from my husband for the first time in months.  We decided that we both still love each other and wanted to try to work things out.  I was feeling more commited to this idea then I had in a long time but even though it was his idea, he was still feeling very doubtfull.  He said he has a lot on his plate right now and though he loves me, was not sure he could handle a relationship as rocky as ours right now.  So after a couple of weeks of talking on the phone, he finally decided that we should just part ways..  What bothers me most about this is that even though I know I love my husband very much.. this did not affect me as much as I feel it should have.  Infact.. the very next day my girlfriend set me up with this guy who I ended up fucking that same night.  I cryed about the break up a little.. but a big part of me was very excited about the prospect of being single again.  A couple of days later my husband called me and said he still loves me and that he misses me and still wants to work things out.  I agreed but soon after started having doubts again... I told him about them and then I told him about what I did with the guy my friend set me up with.  So we broke up.  He said that he didn't understand why it seems like I don't care about him at all.. I was wondering the same thing. 
20th-Jul-2006 07:15 pm(no subject)
Romeo & Juliet
ur name: Mary-Beth
age: 17
sex: Female
location: New York
occupation: Student
hobbies: Reading, writing, playing piano, listening to heavy metal, smoking weed, exercising, learning new things
fav bands: Atrocity, Leave's Eyes, System of a Down, Murderdolls ... man, I know I left some good ones out ...
marital status: The male population has seemed to come to an agreement that I am invisible

I am depressed and I have no one to talk to. I've holed myself up in my room all summer, seeing no one, because I am anti-social and a loner. Whenever I am around people, I feel like I'm screaming inside and everyone is deaf to my pain. No one wants me. I lost my best friend because he fell in love with me and told me he couldn't talk to me anymore if I wouldn't be his girlfriend, and lately he has taken to leaving me nasty E-mails. My mother thinks I'm a lesbian for some reason. Uggh, life sucks.
12th-May-2006 08:48 pm(no subject)
ur name:Sarah
fav bands:don't know
marital status:single
i need help i have an ED and i don't know what to do i don't know how to ask for help.my boyfriend went into the mental hospital for suicide and i did nothing to stop him we would just takl of ways we could end our lifes since i was suicidal too. but i'm not anymore!
it feels all my fault. what should i do my friend said that if i really want to stop SI then to speak w/the school guidance counselor but i don't know what should i do.
12th-Mar-2006 03:55 pm(no subject)
Ponder//Zachary Quinto
Your name: Lizzie
age: 13
sex: Female
location: Canada
occupation: Student
hobbies: Sitting alone in my room doing nothing all day, computer, writing, drawing, (you know, all that creative shit,) playing the guitar, music, watching T.V., pissing people off and tons more.
fav bands: Green day, fall out boy, all american rejects, Relient k, Amber pacific, Theory of a deadman, Nickelback, Simple plan, Linkin park, Panic! At the disco, Blink 182, Papa roach...etc...
marital status: Taken.

I just need someone to talk too. But no one listens to me...

And i'm kinda tired of being to girl no one cares about. I want to mean something to anyone...
11th-Dec-2005 03:01 pm - don't know what to do!!!!
well life's boring and i don't know what to do anymore i hate it i want to tell some1 but am afriad what to do!?!?
3rd-Dec-2005 03:39 pm - Hello =)
I have decided to create a community solely for the purpose of broadcasting Code Amber alerts. There is no need to join the community unless you wish to do so. Just simply "friend" the community and you will recieve the Amber alerts on your friend's page!!

I will also be putting up some other helpful links & news periodically, but they will be dated in the future so that they will stay at the top of the page to be easily accessable for visitors of the community! Therefore, you will not receive them on your friends page....so be sure to visit often!! Thank you for your concern in saving a child's life!!
28th-Oct-2005 03:20 am(no subject)
ur name: Lisa
age: 27
sex: female
location: SWVA
occupation: stay-at-home-momma
hobbies: many, many different things....uhm...scrapbooking, reading dr. phil books, webpage design, photography, crafts, online chat, graphic design, writing, photo-editing, pilates, kickboxing, strip-tease aerobics (fun, fun, fun), martial arts, listening to music, creating videos & slideshows, interior decorating, activism for children's rights, anything to do with philosophy or psychology.....that's all that comes to mind at the moment...lol
fav bands:again, there's too many to name...but here are a few, Enya (love, love, love her), Chicago, Foreigner, Atlantic Starr, LeAnn Rimes, 3 Doors Down, Black Eyed Peas, Coldplay, Matchbox 20....
marital status: Married & Loving It!!! ;))
28th-Oct-2005 09:22 am - Welcome
Just want to welcome everyone who joined this community. Please feel free to share here your problems and support each other. Thank you!

Rock On, alisa
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